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Voile Nano Straps

$4.50

Voile came out with the Nano straps to deal with the epidemic of lost Bedrock Sandals. Bike packers have been using inferior straps to fasten their ubiquitous sandals to their saddle bags. Rough terrain causes lesser straps to fail, and the Bedrock sandals bounce off into the weeds. Hard rains...

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Voile came out with the Nano straps to deal with the epidemic of lost Bedrock Sandals. Bike packers have been using inferior straps to fasten their ubiquitous sandals to their saddle bags. Rough terrain causes lesser straps to fail, and the Bedrock sandals bounce off into the weeds. Hard rains drive the sandals into ditches, where they are eventually swept into our rivers. Hydropower stations have become jammed with the errant sandals. Last week, the town of Angeldust, PA lost power while the plant workers used a 12 foot piece of PVC and left over fireworks to free a Bedrock sandal jam in the Crud River Hydro Station.

Bald Eagles mistake the sandals for fish and bring the shoes back to their nest to the chagrin of their young. Beavers are building houses out of the sandals, leaving lakes strewn with sticks. It’s a crisis.

The EPA contacted Voile to address the lost sandal situation. They told Voile 2 things: solve the crisis and that climate change is a hoax.  (For the record, it's real)

These tiny straps are good for sandal security, tube wrapping, banana binding, disc brake bleeding, and American Doll hostage situations.