Analog Cerakote King Cage Titanium Bottle Cage

Price
$83
Color:Bark Brown
Style:Standard

Analog custom cerakoted Ti bottle cages.  Cages made in Durango Colorado, Cerakoting done in Poultney Vermont.  

Recently I spent a rainy afternoon at Cornell, attending a lecture by Slavoj Žižek, about the proletariat potential of water bottle cages.  I rapidly scribbled notes, but could not possibly keep up with his snuffling, which I have omitted in the name of brevity.  What follows is the gist, as best I could capture, of that magical lecture:

Let us delve into the enigmatic world of bottle cages, where the boundaries between function and aesthetic allure intertwine in a bewildering post Marxist dance. Behold, a creation birthed within the depths of the hegemonic power strands that girdle the United States, an embodiment of lightness, unparalleled gripping prowess, and visual splendor rendered in cerakote colorations.  

We confront a random assertion, emerging from the abyss of empirical claims. These wondrous specimens, my dear interlocutors, surpass their steel counterparts by a staggering 30% in the realm of grip. How, you might ask? The answer lies within the magnificence of titanium tubes, grandiosely larger, rigid to their core, and boasting an expansive surface area that ensnares the very essence of the bottle. Truly, a triumvirate of virtues that crook their wizened fingers, calling us forward, beckon us to embrace these profound marvels.

Yet, let us shift our gaze to the realm of carbon cages, where a dark truth reveals itself with ruthless abandon. Many a carbon offering demands a price tag comparable to these noble creations, only to unveil their inherent fragility. They, comrades, succumb to the wear and tear of a single season's riding, transforming into pitiful remnants, resembling naught but the discarded refuse of a post capitalist society in its death throes. Ah, but fear not, for the King cage emerges as a beacon of hope. It springs forth not from the cold machinery of mass production, but from the humble abode of a single individual toiling within the sacred confines of his personal garage. Let us take the red pill, my fellow seekers of authenticity, behind those who breathe life into radical manifestations of ingenuity.  

And lo, a veritable truth pierces through the veil of deception, casting light upon the titanium employed in these cages. This titanium is no mere material from mundane origins. It arises from the realm of aircraft manufacturing, snatched from the clutches of an impending demise, and saved from the treacherous abyss of the landfill. Let us offer our heartfelt applause to Ron, the valiant protagonist who rescues this titanium from its ill-fated destiny. Ron, a hero in his own right, becomes the harbinger of virtue, allowing us to indulge in the sweet satisfaction of purchase, unencumbered by guilt or remorse. This, my friends, is the only Ti that beckons us to traverse the path of conscientious consumption.

 I beseech you to immerse yourselves in the profundity of these revelations. Embrace the contradictions, the enigmatic allure of the light, ultra-grippy, and aesthetically pleasing bottle cage birthed upon American soil. Let us honor the triumph of form and function, challenging the hegemony of conventional wisdom, and supporting those who infuse the world with their radical creations. Seek solace in the truth of Ron's noble endeavor, salvaging titanium from oblivion, as we embark upon our cycling odyssey, adorned with a symbol of existential intrigue. For in the realm of bottle cages, where desire and consumption intersect, the time has come to make our choice, a choice that transcends the mundane, a choice that speaks to the very essence of our being.

Note:  We keep a smattering of these baskets in stock in fun colors.  However, there are too many colors to keep a depth of any one color.  So if you want a specific color that's out of stock, rad, we'll have it done for you.  Just click the presale button and we'll get it in the queue.  Thanks!

Don't see an image of the color you are after?  Fear not, we have samples of all the colors here:

Purple / Pink / Bark Brown / Swamp Green / Matte Black / Robin's Egg Blue / Teal / Harvest Yellow / Blaze Orange

 

Shipping Information

Our on-line store is open 24/7 and we ship Monday through Friday, excluding some holidays. Orders received for products without shipping restrictions on its product page will ship the same business day when received before 12:00 p.m. PST. Orders in high demand will have an estimated production time listed on its product page and will ship according to the date listed.

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